Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Musings on Sex Appeal

Who doesn't want to be sexy? Well, who over the age of 12, that is? I think even elderly people want to remain somehow attractive to the opposite sex. If you consider 52 elderly, I can personally vouch for it. I recognize (sadly) that the tools one can employ in the pursuit of sexiness become more and more limited as one ages. Bare midriff tops are no longer in my arsenal. Nevertheless, I still pursue sexiness in an age-appropriate sort of way.

Yesterday I read another interesting WikiHow article, this time on "How to Be Hot." The tips were good ones, from how to dress to how to think. The article closed with the advice that if you, for whatever reason, can't do "hot," there's no shame in going for other forms of attractiveness, like cute or distinguished. Again, the key is feeling that you are appealing to other humans, that they will be motivated to want to be around you.

Meanwhile, yesterday was an interesting one for my family, as my older daughter was in a competition to be selected as one of twenty local singles for an upcoming feature in the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel. (She made it, by the way!) Katie's photo and some personal remarks were included. I figured her remarks were friendly and charming, and her photo would be the clincher. Sure enough, the top vote-getting girls all were pretty and approachable.

Well, it so happens one of the top vote-getting guys was a fellow named John, age 71. I'm sure a lot of ladies, myself included, were tickled that this guy entered the competition at all. What a go-getter. Granted, our votes didn't exactly mean we'd date him, but we'd certainly go out for beers with him. And at 71, that's endorsement enough! So John beat out some hot 20-somethings, and more power to him.

Second meanwhile: Yesterday I discovered Crest was promoting its White Strips product by creating a site where you can experience "virtual 3D kisses" from your choice of male or female. (Visit I have to give kudos to Crest, both the guy and the girl did it for me! LOL Seriously though, I was amazed how the flirtatious moves of "Fernando," directed right at me from the screen, set my heart a-flutter. His kisses (there are six different ones) are really a little mini-seminar in how to spark a woman's libido. (Please excuse the 3D effects in the screen cap below.)

Well, I'm not going to turn this post into my own tips for being sexy...that ground has been covered well enough by others with more expertise than I. The point is, the whole issue is not going to go away and is a part of life. Those of us who can't compete on the level of Hollywood celebrities, due to genetics, age, or both, are not exempt. And rather than bash our heads into the wall, or rather, mirror, we need to remember that anyone can do things to encourage others to want to be near them. It's amazing how "alluring" things like kind words, thoughtful attire, humor, little gifts of food or homemade crafts, smiles, welcoming body language, empathy, camaraderie, or a well-timed hug can be.

Those things are not "sexy" in the classic sense, but they bring people closer together nonetheless. Close = good in my book.


Miss Organizized said...

I think the fact that John the 71 year old made it is just too cool! He inspired a lot of confidence and that's pretty darn sexy! Meanwhile, there's this woman who works in my office who is definitely in the 60s neighborhood, but she's very fit, has a great sense of style, has the absolute sweetest personality, and is just generally easy going and I am a youngish hetero woman, and *I think she's totally sexy! Even if you can't pull off 'scantily clad' or act cutesy flirtatious, anyone can pull off sexy, whatever age, if you've got the right attitude!

Diana Laurence said...

Very well said and too true! I always think too of people like Bette Midler who are not conventionally pretty or skinny, but exude joy and self-love (the good kind). That's truly what makes a woman attractive for the long term.