Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Sometimes It’s Just Physical


I was one of those little kids who loved frosting. I’d take the corner piece of cake anytime, to get that extra butter and sugar. In fact, I’d even try to get the piece covered with frosting roses. As I got older, however, I learned to prefer the cake. Nowadays there are some cakes I adore (like my rum cake) that have no frosting whatsoever.

That also applies quite a bit to my history with men. When I was younger, it was the fancy exterior that got me drooling. Nowadays, I am often drawn to frosting-less men who are wonderful inside. That definitely applies to my Edward J. Olmos thing of ‘06-’07. It was sort of a similar story with Les Stroud, whom I didn’t find overly handsome until I learned to love his personality. Neil Gaiman? Well, yeah, there’s some fine chocolate frosting on that man, but it’s his cake that really won my heart.

But occasionally still, it’s all about the frosting.

Last night Davie and I watched the premiere of ABC’s “Fringe.” I was very excited about this show, and not only because J.J. Abrams is brilliant and I love paranormal stories. No, mostly I was anticipating seeing Joshua Jackson every week. He was mighty nice back in his days as Pacey “on the Creek,” and age has only improved him. There are not a lot of actors these days that make my pulse run rampant whenever they are on screen, but he is one of them.


As Peter Bishop, genius ne’er-do-well son of a mad scientist (there’s a nice bio), Josh has a very entertaining, sexy role to play. But to me, the cool role is just icing on the...er...frosting. At one point mid-show, Davie asked me, “So...what exactly about this guy that you like so much?” All I could say was, “Everything.” Could I be any more specific? I’ll really try, because I care about you guys! Well, he does have that whiskery-thin-lipped Les Stroud/Kenneth Branagh thing going on that so sends me. Swoon. And gorgeous eyes and amazing brows. Nice physique, too. He looks really, really good when brooding. Or when cracking jokes in a cranky way.

Am I not ashamed of being shallow? Wait, it gets worse.

Let’s talk about pure-butter-and-sugar-and-not-a-cake-crumb-to-be-seen. Meet: the Kohl’s guy.


I don’t know his name although I think my daughter Amanda could find out; she works for Kohl’s ecommerce department. In fact, among her co-workers, this model is known as “the guy Amanda’s mom likes.” I gotta admit, I love that.

Anyway, I have been lusting for this guy for years every Sunday when he appears in the Kohl’s newspaper circular. You know me and blond beards. I just think he is startlingly dreamy and if I ever met him (which is a tiny potentiality because I guess the circulars are actually shot here in Milwaukee) I would be speechless.

Obviously I have no idea what this guy is like. He dresses nicely, of course. LOL And looking at him, I can imagine he’s intelligent, sincere, heterosexual, and has a dry and slightly dark sense of humor. Can’t you? Of course! And isn’t he just irresistible?

I guess not, actually! I found a discussion about my guy on the LafayetteMoms forum, and most of them beg to differ with me! Read on:

Kohl’s male model; Hot or Not?

Sorry to bring down the level of discourse but I was curious to know what other people think. Kohl’s uses this blond male model in their ads for their Chaps line of clothes. He is on the cover of today’s ad. Every time I see him I think he looks more likely to be arrested for petty theft than to sell designer clothes. Do you think he’s handsome?

--I like dark hair and eyes myself, but I think he’s pretty handsome -- could probably stand to shave, though!

--I think he looks kinda ker-blah, not really anything special. I also enjoy dark hair and eyes. The look on the model’s face isn’t really too pleasant, he looks very cocky and not friendly. Advertising with him for Father’s Day isn’t too smart on Kohl’s part. I want (and have) a nice kind "daddy" type guy.

--He’s got all the right features to be attractive, but he is not what WOWS me either. I think it is the scruff that makes him look more ‘wanted’....by the authorities, not women, that is! lol- totally just joking!! I am sure there are plenty of women who do find him attractive, or he wouldn’t have made it into modeling!

--Not a hottie to me........

--I agree - I don’t care for the scruffy look. Now, the guys on page 18-19 in the same ad are more my idea of hot.
Crazy women! I suppose next someone is going to tell me Joshua Jackson leaves them cold.

Fine, leave me to my plate of frosting, I don’t care! ;-)

8 comments:

Amanda "Z" Nelson said...

Ahhh I love this post! Okay JJ is gorge. Like, wow. We watched Fringe last night (we can discuss more tomorrow) and I was just blown away. I loved him 'on the Creek' as well as various teen movies I went to in high school, but he has seriously aged well. I think his character is super cool too. He's very well suited for it.

Ohhh Kohl's guy aka Mike Fontenot's dapper older brother. Interesting reading what other people think of him. Like what's wrong with the scruffy look? I love that combined with the nice, tailored suit. But man if you ever wanted to create a 'hot blonde Kohl's guy hall of fame' I've got enough pictures to set you up for life ;-)

Diana Laurence said...

Manzi, you kill me! Too funny! Please don't feed my Kohl's guy obsession. Joshua (whom I still call "Pacey," sorry) is another story. I'm ready for more Fringe science already! But yeah...what's wrong with [Mark DeRosa] scruffy, people? It's called "masculinity." LOL

Miss Organizized said...

Yeah this post was totally on point...Mandsi and I discussed it a bit last night. I was talking about how when *I was younger I was into the likes of Gary Sinise, Ed Harris, and Tommy Lee Jones?? THOSE were the dudes hanging up on my walls! All cake baby, all cake. And now of course I lust over Benry, the Joker, and T-Bag...yikes anyone? That's not even cake anymore...it's like rotten uncooked batter with knifes and lint! Ah, but the frosting isn't too far away in the likes of some delicious Sawyer :)

PS Don't even get me started on Joshua Jackson...he absolutely kills me.

And where was the "have my cake and eat it too"in this post? ;)

Diana Laurence said...

Thanks Katesi, and clearly my metaphor is working for you! Ah Sawyer...there's a guy with cake AND plenty of frosting...

Anonymous said...

I agree 100% on the kohl's blond male model. he's yum-a-licious.

Diana Laurence said...

I have subsequently learned his name is Kevin Rice. And he certainly has scads of fans. You can even become his fan on Facebook!

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately, Kevin Rice is NOT on Facebook.

Anonymous said...

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Kevin-Rice-the-Kohls-hunk/59378131485