Saturday, October 29, 2005

Seven Tips for a Little Erotic Boost

Everyone could use a little sexual boost now and again, and sometimes it takes a bit of effort. So I compiled this list of a few ideas for simple ways to get a little erotic thrill (other than the obvious manual way, LOL) that I hope will inspire you.
  1. Review your photo collection. C'mon, just about anyone with a computer has a few photos saved up on his/her hard drive. Have yourself a little electronic beauty contest and pick out who is your favorite on this particular day. The winning photo gets to be posted as your wallpaper (assuming it's PG rated or you have no young children about, of course).
  2. Pick the sexiest song on your iPod or CD rack. If you have some time to kill and want a really fun erotic project, make a compilation CD of hot music. But for something quicker, pick out one excellent song, turn out the lights, and listen to it with headphones. Sting's "Every Breath You Take" still works for me.
  3. Have an imaginary date. Ask yourself these questions: Who would I most want to go out with tonight, living or dead or imaginary? What would be the most sensual possible setting? How would he or she convince me to make love? And what about it would be the really, really wonderful part? By way of illustration, here's my answers for tonight: Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy. A beautifully furnished room with a balcony overlooking a tropical sunset. He'd give me a few of those brooding looks of longing. Getting to stare at that face after he fell asleep.
  4. Try to locate your most unexpected erogenous zone. This one requires some serious privacy so you may need to take a long bubble bath. :-) You know where the obvious spots are, but have you ever determined for certain what places work best for you that aren't on the map? Me, I have an amazingly sensitive spine. But the bottoms of my feet are also a contender. Adjunct suggestion: bring your discovery up to your partner some time, as in, "Dear, I discovered recently I have an amazingly sensitive spine. In a good way." A wink may be required to get the message across.
  5. Write an erotic story, poem, or letter about someone you know. Undoubtedly you've got a crush on some friend, co-worker, store clerk, whatever. Put it down on paper, in all its raunchy glory. Then the next time you see the person, think about what you wrote and smile slyly to yourself. It's all in good fun. Important note: erase said document or put a password on it...if it falls into the wrong hands, the erotic effect will definitely decrease, and that will be only one of your problems.
  6. Meditate upon the subject of your own desires. By this I mean, make a little mental list of the things that really move you sexually. What are your own personal unique turn-ons? I, for example, just love the "come here" beckoning fingers gesture. Like the one Vince Vaughn does in the dance sequence near the end of "Old School." All I have to do is picture an attractive man doing that and I just melt. I also like beards, dress shirts with the cuffs rolled up a bit, and deep sonorous voices.
  7. Create a mental highlight reel. When's the last time you reviewed your own erotic memories? Your brain is full of fun sexy anecdotes, so flip through the scrapbook. What was the first time you felt a flicker of desire for someone of the opposite sex? How did you feel about your first celebrity crush? What was that song that always reminded you of that really hot guy in college? What thing was done to you by a lover that made you the most wild? When did you feel the most sexy and attractive to someone else? What secret and clandestine moment have you never shared with anyone but the other person who shared it with you?

The key to all this, of course, is the key to all things erotic: imagination. You'll be amazed how a few strokes to that particular organ can work even better than--well, you know.

Have fun!

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